Monday, March 29, 2010

lucky




It was my girlfriend's birthday in New York this past weekend, and I was lucky enough to snag this dress from H&M's garden collection. It was the last one in the store!
Needless to say, we had a blast dancing the night away.
Images from H&M's Garden Collection press site.





my middle name is fat

crispy roast pork skins from N.Y. Noodle Town.
my new weekend diet.


Tuesday, March 23, 2010






dancing shoes

the windy corridor

in the corridor between the apartment complex and the deli, the leaves gather and swirl with the wind trapped between the brick passage way, making a mini tornado. its a lovely sight, one right of of American Beauty on rare occasions when a plastic bag from the grocers across the street finds it way into the windy corridor. sometimes i walk by and stop in the middle of the swirl, letting the leaves fly around me, while i become the eye of the storm.

strangers pass each other here, waiting for the elevator, on their way about their days, barely making eye contact. just a quiet passageway, where souls pass with out a second thought, a small space in between the hustle of every day life.



i'm the hero of the story

this is the most heartbreaking scene from my favorite movie, 500 Days of Summer. Enjoy.





Tuesday, March 16, 2010

the travel bug





My brain is on vacation. I am slacking and I LOVE IT! Productivity has gone on strike and just about every other day I go on www.slh.com to check out what amazing hotels they have in some magical foreign land (Marrakesh, anyone?). The pictures above are from the Mykonos Grand Hotel in Greece.

Time to take a break and get some cupcakes.

Lazy this week.


Friday, March 12, 2010

of madness



it has always been music that healed me. and through blasting vampire weekend and passion pit in the car in the bright early mornings of driving to work, it has awakened what was suppressed inside of me these past few months as I became strictly utilitarian in my ways, focusing on the end result of the project, and producing and completing with every hour in my day.

my imagination withered away. no books. there was no time for books.

the lover gifted me with "The Lost City of Z" this past weekend and I haven't been able to put it down. I have a thing for non-fictions about deadly obsessions. i tend to get carried away in my flights of fancy so much so that I stay up until dawn to research, learn more, absorb everything i can. a part of me, a wild fanatical part, can relate to Percy Fawcett and David Grann, the author of the book; you discover something private and hidden within the confides of your room late at night and you can't believe it's never been dissected before. so you put yourself to task. and that is where sanity ends and exploration begins to take flight. I want to explore the world. i want to absorb my lovers mind until i can read it and know it better than him. it scares him a little.


Shutter Island was amazing. It reminded me of The Bell Jar. it's about madness that doesn't know that it's mad, and there lies the irony and tragedy of the story. There lies the pathetic plot-driven punchline the protagonist failed recognized that we sometimes wished for them to stay in their madness, rather than subject them to the cruelty of reality.

madness that originates from pain is strangely memorizing. masochistic in the curiosity it brings about and has a hold on you, gripped until the moment of resolution. sort of shameful in a way. it's a trap to lure you in, you know it is, but you can't pull away.





invisible



To live is the rarest thing in the world.
Most people exist, that is all.






i hope so




Feel it rain, we're alive!


I've been sort of addicted to the enchanting words of Passion Pit.

like the sun and the moon i will circle you til you bloom
i will crush, i will maul, i will burn until i get to you

-folds in your hand




you came beating like moth's wings
spastic and violently
whipping me into a storm
shaking me down to the core

-moth's wings




my face blew up at such a casual sight
the smattered colours of ecstatic fright
the rush above me to oblivion
outlining wet sidewalks in halogen

-little secrets





Thursday, March 11, 2010

alice

Saw Tim Burton's version of Alice in Wonderland last night. And I loved it. Need to watch again.

Though Johnny Depp always freaks me out when he plays asexual-androgynous characters. Think Willy Wonka and now the Mad Hatter. There's something dark in his eyes that doesn't make his character's innocence believable. It just creeps me out.


Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Limited Edition Shirts; Photo shoot


2 unedited shots from our photo shoot for our limited edition shirts containing the mantra of my organization. The shirt was a collaboration with the talented designer, Collin O'Brien from Clockwise Clothing, who is a friend and also an inspiration.


woman in love


Per my adorable reader's request, the book is called Woman in Love by DH Lawrence. You can read it online here.


Tuesday, March 9, 2010

holiday!




"If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall."

Nadine Stair


The weekend was spectacular. And we did absolutely nothing. We just ate and watched Shutter Island (it's so good, go see it!), and slept past noon all weekend.

It was just want I needed. With no big fundraiser on the horizon and nothing going on really (actually I have to run a photo shoot tonight and team meeting on Saturday...but no event is a breath of fresh air for me) I was finally able to relax. And will continue to.



Next up is our trip to Puerto Rico. I think the dreary winter and work load took a toll on both of us, and we were desperate for a vacation. So last week the boyfriend suggest Puerto Rico for a short 4-night vacation since flights to and from are only 4 hours from New York, it would do for a nice short vacation

What started out as a simple whim, became a full fledged plan when we impulsively booked our package through cheapcaribbean.com at the Conrad Hotel. After the dust of excitement settled, I looked at the hotel and realized it just didn't fit us at all as a couple. It was chintzy and reminded me of Vegas, or something that wanted desperately to be like Vegas but failed miserably. So I asked around and my good friend who is also a talented photographer, Tony Yang, told me about his stay at the Hotel El Convento. He stayed there a few times and his images brought the hotel to life.

Looking at his pictures further made me realize how wrong the Conrad was for us.

Tony's friend, El Bob, a native of Puerto Rico.


Sure, it's a 4 night vacation, but I didn't want to settle. I wanted a great vacation and I am a little more than anal about the hotels I stay in. So I did another impulsive thing and called Cheap Caribbean to cancel our reservation. It was impossible. The agent refused to give. The best she said she could do was give me a credit for future travels. We were stuck with the Conrad it seems. The cancellation policy at Cheap Caribbean was made for their benefit and not for the protection of the consumer. It seemed like an iron clad clause that I could not get around.

Until the boyfriend stepped in. He once rescued my Balenciaga from Neiman Marcus (story on that later), and now he stepped in again. One call to Cheap Caribbean and he magically got the agent to refund us in full for the trip. We booked El Convento right after with flights through Expedia. It came out to be $200 more than our original package with the Conrad, but I can already feel like it will be worth it.

I'm so excited for my vacation. We are leaving in late May. Tony asked if I had my outfits planned already.

I do.

That's what girls do.



Friday, March 5, 2010

tapping my fingers for 5:40PM

Leaving for New York tonight and am in the total opposite mood than the one I had at the beginning of this week. Maybe it's because the sun is finally out or because writing out my feelings, however vague, works wonders.

Above is Zara's new TRF campaign for spring 2010 that they just posted online today, and I find myself wearing the same shoes. Got them 2 weeks ago in the city, and decided they were the perfect transition from winter to spring, plus they make such great casual heels for every day wear.

I think after almost a year of having a NY/DC relationship, I've still yet to master how to fit everything into a small weekender bag. But it's a good thing the lover is a gentleman and carry my heavy suitcase for me. =)


Wednesday, March 3, 2010

"The woman who follows the crowd will usually go no further than the crowd. The woman who walks alone is likely to find herself in places no one has ever been before." -Albert Einstein




acceptance

The fundraiser is finally over. And it was a huge success. We were covered in many of the local media outlets, including on a news radio station. But most of all we managed to help change the lives of 50 women because the money we raised enabled 50 women to be able to get screened for breast cancer with no charge. I am so happy that all my work paid off and I can finally rest.

But socially drained doesn't even begin to explain how I feel right now. I think at the core I am anti-social. So I yearn to fly away somewhere away from people, away from friends, or maybe just into the warm arms of those who I can be myself with. Who let me be sad or unhappy or dissatisfied.

I have a friend who is in worse shape than me, but I won't tell her to "Cheer up" or look at her like an untouchable when she fails to obey orders. To her, I will say, "Some days are good, and some days are bad. But the beauty of life is that, it goes on." And she can cry as much as she wants and it might break my heart, but that's life.

The warmest touches are from the ones who don't try to change you or make you better, but from the ones who just love you in whatever state you are in. I feel like I am fighting with myself, my very being and I don't like it because I was relying too much on others to tell me how I should feel. But the truth is I am this. And that's all there is to it. Tomorrow it'll go away or it won't. But tomorrow, whoever sticks around will be the ones who love me most.

And I am the biggest hypocrite of this. I've always seen the flaws in all my friends, blatantly point them out, and try to force them to change. In my head I was doing them a favor. Change is progress and if you are not working every day to better yourself, then you become stagnant; in life and personal growth. But being hyper critical and analytical doesn't facilitate change. It makes people feel worse. It pushes them away.

Only through acceptance, which is love, will others learn to love themselves. And when they do, things will get better.

Lots of introspection going on lately. I seriously need a vacation.


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